It has been long enough. I am rested. I am fat. I am eager to begin new adventures in the new year! Today is the first day of the next several months of Scramble To Get Things Done: there's a lecture for tomorrow, a copy-center list for Thursday, a training.... and the ironing, the freezer repair guy, and walking the dog. I rather like Monday mornings!
Yesterday, I woke up thinking about that old job I was fired from. Depressing. Like a nightmare morphed into a daymare. As if I needed new reasons to beat down my burgeoning self-esteem. I still don't know why I got sacked -- the promised letter has not arrived -- and the silence from people I "knew" for three years is deafening. I'm sure that there are lies being told about me.... So early on a Sunday morning I stay there in bed, tortured, in despair. Oh, to see the truth!!! Is it possible I forgot something important, and forgot it so well that I still haven't remembered? Alzheimer's?!?!?! Is it possible that I was fooled by the social smiles of so many, and I was fired by a collective desire? I know that I'd be happiest to be emotionally done with it!! How long will that take? What would that take, I wonder? I imagine a contigent of apologists at my door and my queenly disdain in the face of their pleading with me to return. I got up. Coffee is needed. I can be sensible after coffee.
I've gone a week plus a day without a cigarette. When I start craving one, and the little Beast in my Brain starts the "yes, you can have one" muttering, I run up and down the stairs with an armful of wood for the fireplace.... puff! puff! (thank god, no wheezing!) puff! puff! QUIT! :)
Vacation included family time. I'll muse on that later, after I get the first thing done on my Do-List for Monday -------------- it's already almost 9:00 AM and I've been working for two hours with no crossing-off on the list!
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